A little tid-bit

I handle emotions differently than pretty much every person I know, but this doesn't mean I don't have them. I just am not as expressive with them. It's not that I don't cry, I just never let people see me cry. I'm apologizing for the things I have put people through. I didn't plan for the things that have happened. But even the most seemingly perfect humans make mistakes. And that is exactly all I am. Human. I was wrong. I made a mistake. I'm trying my hardest to fix it. But understand I ,and only I, can fix it. I am searching for my happiness. And it is elusive. The door has closed and the light has shut off. But I'm looking for the moonlight coming from my window. And right out that window is my paradise. And I'm going to do what's right for me to get out that window. No matter what it takes I am going to find that window and get out of it. I know I am a selfish and irresponsible person. You were right there. I know I don't always deal with everything right but it's only because I don't know how to deal with them. And a problem is that I do what feels right in the moment. I don't often think about the consequences. I don't often use my head. And I probably should. I know everything that you have done has been to protect me and get me to realize. Even though I haven't told you, I really do appreciate that. And I do care. I know I am on the verge of adult hood and there are some very real things coming my way. Some very hard things are coming my way. I just hope I can do what's right for myself. And to you: I'm sorry. I love you. I wish things could have turned out differently but they didn't. And this is how it should be. This is how it's supposed to be. ***4 Days Until Florida!!!***